Of Trainwreck and tragedy twins (brothers of the war, our within)

wars everywhere.

man vs woman
gay vs straight
black vs white
left vs right
technology vs nature

the social media obsessed,
phone-fried, head down
never looking up, or around
selfie-soaked to oblivion,
drowned

"family with kids", consumed
that's their whole identity, doomed

and the ones like me
by their loneliness, groomed

outsiders, outcasts
freaks, so forced to the strangulation
"the masks"

in a world where little, of substance,
soul, lasts

to wake up and breathe here,
the most heroic of tasks...

don't call me anything
just call me human.

I pledge my allegiance
to know one, eight then

their beings, like god, send
yes, we, the beauty betrayed,
last whisper, (a secret)
in them, I still believe
there's a heaven.

(of love).


be it "train wreck and tragedy"
touched, somewhere, still alive,
they see

things with wisdom, and  sight,
as they are
you'd call them friends,
I call them stars

wars and wars and wars
again.
"the normals" crave bullshit
like the sanctimonious crave sin

rich vs poor
less vs more
credit vs cash
my heart vs my ass

one throbs, the other sobs
rarely in unison
older, and worn,
I should be at peace
that there is nothing left to prove, then

but with all this war
and all this crazy
my "tism" is prone
to monosyllabic "mazing"

just want to walk
and never stop walking
away from all the meaningless talking
away from all the "this vs that"

but then heaven, with him
just enraptured, we sat

and communed
cajoled
and left behind
all the roles

skinless and soul sexed
I saw a new mutation
of a passion, perplexed

that unbeknownst to me
there could be found, his kind
of one that I have never seen

one that I have never known.
somehow, in his presence
I feel realized, and not, in the least,
alone

I guess that's what others mean,
when they say that thing,
"I feel at home"

just the want to stay,
not run, not roam

some wars
inside
have hidden healings,
(feelings)

intoned.

(I dare not dream, but I do, just the same)

for a love,
unlabeled
unleashed,

hear my name.

(in the hum of your heartbeat, in the search, your "someone", your "same")

you came.
so did I.
no need to worry or question
or "why?"

just pray, like thunder
and shine, like rain

may he one day "come to"
and see, here, in one, we
our two.

twins.

can't fuck.
but can we finally turn,
alter the course of "the damned",
bent, "bad luck"

maybe,
maybe not
no game, this flower pluck,
garbage, "he loves me, loves me not"

some things just are,
take the chance
or fester, the scar

recognize your kind
or risk the ruin, the light, left behind
a light that's diminishing
day after day

the endless bitching and moaning,
from chosen corners,
coveted, victims
"look at me, us, our pain"

we've all got it
in different forms, called
"societal norms"

trapped and crapped
and tricked and dicked

for every asshole
there's a conniving bitch

so back to "distance, social",
survive

but in him
I felt
the want, impassioned,
cultivate, "thrive"

it begins and ends
those god dreamed eyes
where sweet meets sadness
woe meets wise

electric
non-expectant
just here
and there
and everywhere

no wonder, he afraid
my intense and focused,
ever-present stare

the one that speaks
"I am really here",
unlike all the others,
they, the "all talk", me, the endeared

wars
once more
and the battle
scarred,
"come, oblivion", wish

tell me,
whose twin
would you die
their arms, to be devoured in,
kiss,

live.
again.

the gorgeous,
unexpected.
soul drowning,
ever confounding.

(him).

twin.

brother, of the war
"our within".


bowen hart roselli
21 march 2020
ringwald love