in the lair of the lion, alone

follow your own path
reap the warring wrath
of opinion, opinion
all around
and the more insight you seek,
the more you drown

my fault,
auto-mode
needing to speak,
communicate those close
and that is what happens,
those who matter the most..

see and perceive you,
as they do
love and connection,
a gift
but you gotta know
when, trust yourself, alone
it's arms are outstretched, calling you

hardest thing in the world, let go
of all the things you think you know
questioning every move you make
worried, perceptions of others
the steps you take

then fire rises deep inside,
fuck "the need", fuck the tries
to be understood,
its about as possible
as "soft and moist" is wood

and so the war, is really within
and without, "the guy"
who the answers you seek,
but he will not bend

so you search and search,
emote and write..
what you hope,
be seen as beautiful things
but one can't control
how another reads, perceives..

and with silence, distance
comes a new kind of "destroy"
patience is a virtue,
but so, i guess, i feeling like a toy

to be wound and bound
pulled apart, back and forth
is this all a delusion?
some past life intrusion

i have no clue,
only missing pieces
to a puzzle, befuddled
that to which way
the pressure, releases...

trapped
or not
or simply
an occasional
moment of thought

welcome to a world,
a hundred ways, communicate
but all that means now,
the "oversaturate state"

push it all out,
as in away
and learn to focus
what most is..

important
essential
ignore, block out
all the inconsequential
that drowns us all,
all around, no escape..

cleanse the thoughts in your head
breathe and pray
and learn to breathe, bathe
in the simple silence of

wait.

for answers that may
or may never come
this body, this soul
all that I'll ever know..

this heart, this voice
is there a love to be reflected
"no choice"
as in fall in love with you too
and let one plus one
equal the incredible reality
of two

something, sadly
to the "easy come", easy goes
but to the alone, deep inside
we hold a pain that so few
embrace, seem to know

in the search, feel, awareness, divine
here is not a place,
that values it, valor
land of embittered and bastardized
time

dream, dream on
and shine, if you can
at the end of it all,
what lies left, in your hands?

memories, moments
so like magic, reigned down
simple things, unexpectedly
that made you feel you were wearing
a crown

of unbelievable love
it can happen here,
careful, the tendency to drown
but for the wings and wants
of angels
"no regrets" the attempts
however flawed,

you were found.

alive and impassioned
in a world that cannot understand you
welcome to the inside of self
we all have one, supposedly

and all you will ever be, see, know
in truth, is you
so learn to, for once, and finally

trust

yourself.

because the truth, the answers
you seek
come from him and you
alone and together
an experience
undefinable, unknown,
un-lived

by anyone else.



bowen hart roselli
30 july 2020
ringwald love