no consistency but chaos
like the dentist always changing
what is the best dental floss
or the rinse and spin cycle
before the brain, it is washed
one day it's this,
the next day it's that
always two steps away
from the rug being pulled,
out from under
watch the "wel" turn to "how", in the "come"
on the matt
as in asking, eternal
how and why?, burn infernal
there is no rhyme, if there is no reason
yes, the climate has changed
call it the "free for all" season
is he saying to you, the same things, "tricked",
the soul of words, sobbing,
as they are sent, straight to hell
one second, "enamored"
then in the split, found, forgotten
there is a tighter ass, a leaner frame
in things made of leather,
not 85 percent cotton
the ability to communicate
with the obliterate
of any truth, obligate
as if hundreds of thousands
have entered me, and came
shot their load, and then shit
talked it out of me, same
as in it's all too easy
to say anything and everything, you want
fantasize and proselytize
and then vanish
like a lewded and pillaged, store front
one whose windows
once glistened and gleamed
"walk through me, want me"
"i'm so pretty, so come in and see"
but now it's been robbed
of what once gave it promise
walk past, and ignore
for another, it's a long list.....
of shopping for bodies
and shipping out, fast
sifting through the wreckage
seems to be the only "relation ship", that lasts
trying to make sense of it all,
clear, an actualized vision, a path
pray that there is one
more "reap of reward",
less of wrath
the heart and value
raped and ruined,
we are all doing, what we don't want done
to us, death of trust
and loyalty, like the sun
that we know will always
arise, in the morning
who believes anymore
in the eyes of just one, worth adoring
whole heart, whole mind
whole being, "star seeing"
them, aligned, like a gift
now misread texts, causing rifts
and ruptures, that make
it easy to turn, away, and even better, to fake
all the reasons inside
there is a "run", for the "hide"
behind walls fabricated
of glass and technology
actually feel and mean
what you say, you are damned
alone, a stranger of "the strange", an anomaly
in the smorgasbord
of real intimacy, whored
and pimped, for the "scrabbled"
and best received, in form, "babbled"
as in easy, in the "disposed of"
watch the angels cry, fallen, here
on the death and destruction of love
nothing left to do
but raise your head and look above
to the sky and wonder why
you aren't needed and you are never enough
to be soul seen and felt
and believed and recieved
as the one to give up for
the sword and shield of decieve
"you're so good, you're no good"
you make it too easy for them
in your "give your all, believe"
and then spend your time wondering,
of your "give" where is the return, the recieve
it's not anywhere, bonded, in "lasting"
that i've found
and so emptied, of "illuminate"
here in past loves, lost, i've drowned
waiting to be wanted, reflected, here, found
this is written, in the longing of "him",
a secret wish, his heart
i am praying, my soul enslaving
(his "lasting", not leaving, bond, believing....achieving)
17 may 2019
the realm of the poetic.
prisoner of the psyche and the inescapable. heart.