in eyelids, imagined (yes, i feel him, believe him)

snow falls on eyelids
imaginary insides
where, in this land,
a safe place to hide,
in the arms of another,
beast of beautiful,
without the knife,
come to die

just a little bit
and a bit more
"deep breath"
skin on skin
delicate droplets of sweat
no worry, rip yourself apart
wondering, fearing
what comes next

just peace,
sweet release
if this moment is all we have
why do we waste it with games,
mind, reaped wrath

because we do not know ourselves
as much as we play, pretend
to, and do
because we bleed our "self involved"
onto others, with little thought, hindsight
exactly what we leave behind,
once through

survival of the fittest
but who defined "the fit", first place?
snow falls on eyelids, imagined
as i awaken to your absence
you were never really here or there
just a mesmerizing mirage
of manhood, betrayed
and so the bleed, this removal
tragic

yet somehow
in eyelids, snowfall
shines, sunset
and i smile, your smile
returns again,
you were always here
and never left...within.

begin.
again.

("it's all gonna work out, man"
and it is here,
in his whisper, i somehow believe him,
beyond the wanting wonder of when)


bowen hart roselli
16 may 2020
ringwald love